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Honestly, Stephanie is nmsaa but I think you should go with it especially since you and your husband both love the name and the name means something to you. I can't really think of other female Stephan names other than Stephania. If it doesn't bother you that it's the name of your husband's ex I don't see a problem. Like you said, he called the ex Kitten so he probably doesn't really associate Stephanie with the ex too much. Either way, it's most important how you two feel about the name not how others feel about the name.

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Stephanie Marigold
Stephanie Gabrielle
Stephanie Willa
Stephanie Patrice
Stephanie Faith