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Help[Opinions] This is one of the ones that gets me (m)
in reply to a message by Christa S.
I happen to like 'soft' guys' names. Claiming that 'soft' = necessarily feminine (which I don't think you did, btw; just saying) is pretty much endorsing a sexist conception of both women and men.
So I'm deeply uncomfortable with seeing names I adore on a boy - Hilary, Kelsey, Shannon and the case of cases, Alexis - now being regarded as exclusively female. Genuinely unisex (e.g. Morgan) I can cope with. It's the fact that the ones above have made the move to being "girls' names" and are now pretty much unacceptable on boys as far as the non-namenerd population is concerned.
I would really, genuinely hate for Tristan to go the same way. To me, it's one of the coolest, classiest male names out there, and the story behind the name is beautiful. Tristan is one of the cases that really, really bugs me. Using it on a girl is just . . . wrong.
I think it's because I'm an English student and my area is pretty much medieval lit - to me, Tristan will ALWAYS be the name of a Knight of the Round Table. It's about as feminine as Arthur or Lancelot, i.e. not in the slightest.
I've never seen Tristan used on a girl, and frankly I'm glad of it.
So I'm deeply uncomfortable with seeing names I adore on a boy - Hilary, Kelsey, Shannon and the case of cases, Alexis - now being regarded as exclusively female. Genuinely unisex (e.g. Morgan) I can cope with. It's the fact that the ones above have made the move to being "girls' names" and are now pretty much unacceptable on boys as far as the non-namenerd population is concerned.
I would really, genuinely hate for Tristan to go the same way. To me, it's one of the coolest, classiest male names out there, and the story behind the name is beautiful. Tristan is one of the cases that really, really bugs me. Using it on a girl is just . . . wrong.
I think it's because I'm an English student and my area is pretty much medieval lit - to me, Tristan will ALWAYS be the name of a Knight of the Round Table. It's about as feminine as Arthur or Lancelot, i.e. not in the slightest.
I've never seen Tristan used on a girl, and frankly I'm glad of it.
This message was edited 4/30/2008, 3:35 AM
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Replies
PLEASE KEEP IN MIND...
That I do not have the intellectual capacity as most of you do on the history of names. I was just thinking about this name the other day when I saw it on a post for favorite male names... considering that I have ONLY heard it on girls... which surprised me... for 34 years, I have always thought it was a girls name... so I am sure you can imagine my shock. After reading the meaning of it on this website (because I still did not believe it), I had to ask all of your opinions. So by no means did I mean to make anyone angry/annoyed/frustrated by my question. I would hope you could understand where I was coming from and my ignorance on this name.
Also, the other names I have suggested that I think are traditionally girls names but used on boys... is again, from personal experience and ignorance. That's why I rely on you all to educate me.
And as far as using "soft" goes... I find (and in my opinion as this is an opinion board) there are male names to me that do not sound like they fit with other male names.... and vice versa for girls names that sound too harsh to me... if you want to classify that as sexist... go ahead... because that is the way I feel. I cannot apologize for my opinion, as it still stands the same way... but I am more than happy to be educated by you all on the background of names and learn of their history. Ignorance about the facts can be changed... but the opinion might take a little longer.
That I do not have the intellectual capacity as most of you do on the history of names. I was just thinking about this name the other day when I saw it on a post for favorite male names... considering that I have ONLY heard it on girls... which surprised me... for 34 years, I have always thought it was a girls name... so I am sure you can imagine my shock. After reading the meaning of it on this website (because I still did not believe it), I had to ask all of your opinions. So by no means did I mean to make anyone angry/annoyed/frustrated by my question. I would hope you could understand where I was coming from and my ignorance on this name.
Also, the other names I have suggested that I think are traditionally girls names but used on boys... is again, from personal experience and ignorance. That's why I rely on you all to educate me.
And as far as using "soft" goes... I find (and in my opinion as this is an opinion board) there are male names to me that do not sound like they fit with other male names.... and vice versa for girls names that sound too harsh to me... if you want to classify that as sexist... go ahead... because that is the way I feel. I cannot apologize for my opinion, as it still stands the same way... but I am more than happy to be educated by you all on the background of names and learn of their history. Ignorance about the facts can be changed... but the opinion might take a little longer.
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No problem
I love the range of opinions we get on this board, and I'm cool with it. I certainly wouldn't claim to have any kind of expertise on names in general; I guess Tristan is just one of the ones I feel strongly about.
I think it's a little odd that you met/came across only female Tristans for however long, given that I've never even heard of one, but hey. Weirder things have happened. I imagine that if I was suddenly informed that something I'd always thought was a female name was actually masculine it'd be pretty strange.
Everyone has names that they think are too soft or too hard, or don't fit. I'll never quite be able to get my head around Leto being feminine, for instance. I'm sorry if I overreacted; it's just that Tristan happens to be one that I literally never imagined could be feminine until relatively recently. All the associations I have are male.
Also, because I have Wikipedia open:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tristan - Sir Tristan
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tristan_and_Iseult - The romance of Tristan and Iseult
out of which have been made
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tristan_und_Isolde - The Wagner opera
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tristan_%26_Isolde_%28film%29 - The film with James Franco in it
I can't say I'm much of an opera fan and I've yet to see the film, but the story of Tristan and Iseult (or Yseult, or Isolde, or Isond) is one of my favourite stories from the King Arthur corpus. Sir Tristan is a wonderful character.
I love the range of opinions we get on this board, and I'm cool with it. I certainly wouldn't claim to have any kind of expertise on names in general; I guess Tristan is just one of the ones I feel strongly about.
I think it's a little odd that you met/came across only female Tristans for however long, given that I've never even heard of one, but hey. Weirder things have happened. I imagine that if I was suddenly informed that something I'd always thought was a female name was actually masculine it'd be pretty strange.
Everyone has names that they think are too soft or too hard, or don't fit. I'll never quite be able to get my head around Leto being feminine, for instance. I'm sorry if I overreacted; it's just that Tristan happens to be one that I literally never imagined could be feminine until relatively recently. All the associations I have are male.
Also, because I have Wikipedia open:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tristan - Sir Tristan
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tristan_and_Iseult - The romance of Tristan and Iseult
out of which have been made
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tristan_und_Isolde - The Wagner opera
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tristan_%26_Isolde_%28film%29 - The film with James Franco in it
I can't say I'm much of an opera fan and I've yet to see the film, but the story of Tristan and Iseult (or Yseult, or Isolde, or Isond) is one of my favourite stories from the King Arthur corpus. Sir Tristan is a wonderful character.
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Thanks for the references... when I have time tonight, will definitely go through them.
I lived in So Cal for 19 years, and there was a senior girl in my high school (when I was a freshman) who's name was Tristan Paige... her other siblings were: Demri (girl), Tasmin (girl), Chase (boy), and another weird T girl name that I cannot remember. As you can see, she came from a unique family... but this girl impressed me as she had it all... looks, brains, talent, sweet and kind... etc... so I began to adore the name Tristan after her. She had a niece named after her... so these are the only two girls I have ever known that have this name. Then I moved to Utah... and there are NO Tristan's (boys or girls) that I know of... as you can imagine, Utah is a culture shock from So Cal, and everyone seems to do whatever everyone else does here... so we have an over abundance of Emma's, Jacob's, and names that have been combined (ie Jennalynn)... so there is not much variety here.
Thanks for the further education.
I lived in So Cal for 19 years, and there was a senior girl in my high school (when I was a freshman) who's name was Tristan Paige... her other siblings were: Demri (girl), Tasmin (girl), Chase (boy), and another weird T girl name that I cannot remember. As you can see, she came from a unique family... but this girl impressed me as she had it all... looks, brains, talent, sweet and kind... etc... so I began to adore the name Tristan after her. She had a niece named after her... so these are the only two girls I have ever known that have this name. Then I moved to Utah... and there are NO Tristan's (boys or girls) that I know of... as you can imagine, Utah is a culture shock from So Cal, and everyone seems to do whatever everyone else does here... so we have an over abundance of Emma's, Jacob's, and names that have been combined (ie Jennalynn)... so there is not much variety here.
Thanks for the further education.
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