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Help[Opinions] Re: generally ...
in reply to a message by RoxStar
I didn't think I'd have to spell it out for you.
It's not that I think anyone would actually be incited by your lame joke, to throw things at people.
Insert a different type of believer into your comment, and it's clearer how it might be taken as hateful.
It's a step beyond making fun.
YMMV but I'd be offended if I were a vegan. If I named a baby Tallow (obviously in ignorance), you say there's no need to politely stifle your ridicule - "It'd be alright to laugh openly and throw chunks of animal fat" at me in the street. Because you think my way of life is extreme and self-righteous, you say I don't deserve normal respect. That's what is implied.
Of course I don't think you meant that seriously. If I did, I'd have deleted your message and reported it. I think you were just exaggerating how funny it seems to you. But it came off as hate-ish, to me at least - and you ought to know how you sound. And (this is the more important "moderator" aspect of my addressing you) other people reading can see that there is this boundary on the *kinds* of things that are OK to say here.
My only "clumsy attempt to be ironically funny" was just the conical shape of the hat ... like it's a dummy's hat ... because I feel silly "acting as moderator." I accepted the idea that I'm moderating something, so any time I criticize what someone says, I can't help "acting as moderator." But I'd say this to you even if I weren't supposed to be "moderator." The board is really "moderated" by people just having it out like we are right now.
You're making a personal attack on me, but whatever. I just want you to realize that, to at least someone, your comment seemed too snotty and not civil enough for this board.
- mirfak
It's not that I think anyone would actually be incited by your lame joke, to throw things at people.
Insert a different type of believer into your comment, and it's clearer how it might be taken as hateful.
It's a step beyond making fun.
YMMV but I'd be offended if I were a vegan. If I named a baby Tallow (obviously in ignorance), you say there's no need to politely stifle your ridicule - "It'd be alright to laugh openly and throw chunks of animal fat" at me in the street. Because you think my way of life is extreme and self-righteous, you say I don't deserve normal respect. That's what is implied.
Of course I don't think you meant that seriously. If I did, I'd have deleted your message and reported it. I think you were just exaggerating how funny it seems to you. But it came off as hate-ish, to me at least - and you ought to know how you sound. And (this is the more important "moderator" aspect of my addressing you) other people reading can see that there is this boundary on the *kinds* of things that are OK to say here.
My only "clumsy attempt to be ironically funny" was just the conical shape of the hat ... like it's a dummy's hat ... because I feel silly "acting as moderator." I accepted the idea that I'm moderating something, so any time I criticize what someone says, I can't help "acting as moderator." But I'd say this to you even if I weren't supposed to be "moderator." The board is really "moderated" by people just having it out like we are right now.
You're making a personal attack on me, but whatever. I just want you to realize that, to at least someone, your comment seemed too snotty and not civil enough for this board.
- mirfak
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This is not a complaint, and, not a call (not a plea or not a request) for a moderator to moderate, but if there were greater discretion & tolerance for others' individual opinions, lifestyles &/or beliefs, I'd feel more free to share more stories of having a unique name.
When I first joined, I thought more people with unique names would be on board; I understand now that this is not so.
When I first joined, I thought more people with unique names would be on board; I understand now that this is not so.
This message was edited 8/26/2018, 12:28 PM
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