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[Opinions] Names that are easy to cause a person to be misgendered
Is it easy for a woman named either Alex, Chris, Lee, Mickey, Pat, Sam or Terry to be mistaken for a man or a man named either Courtney, Kelly, Kelsey, Ashley, Dana or Whitney?
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One of my female clients is named Andy, just Andy, not Andrea or anything. She's also married to a woman and when she fills out documents or whatever people automatically think she's a he.
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I have a unisex name irl and it has basically no bearing on how people perceive my gender; it's my voice that makes the difference.
If you're talking just name alone? Yeah, I'd say some of these names (especially Ashley and Courtney) are pretty predominantly seen as m or f despite being technically unisex. If you're looking for an androgynous name, I'd go Alex, Sam, or Lee (if you're in the US, anyway).
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A lot of it depends on the spelling and a lot of these names, as least the ones listed for women, are typically nicknames, so it would depend if I know the full name or not. For me, most people I know named Chris are men named Christopher and for girls I see Kris for Kristina or Christine/Christina going by Christy or Chrissy. Also, most women I know go by Patty instead of Pat, but the men go by Pat. I have only met a man named Terry with that spelling. Any women I have met have spelled it Teri or Terri. Lee I tend to see more masculine and Leigh for girls. I have a friend who is a girl named Micki, so that makes it seem more feminine. Again, it is a nickname. All of those listed as boy names, I would first think were women. I have never met a man with any of those names but have met several women with them. I know some men named Jamie and Shannon. Alex or Sam, I would fully have no idea without a full name or having met them.
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If a man is called Dana, Kelsey, Whitney, Courtney, Ashley, or Kelly, I might think he’s a woman at first. Regardless, I could see them as unisex (more feminine, though). Alex, Terry, Pat, Lee, and Sam are androgynous for me, so I wouldn’t make any assumptions. Except, because of how many male Sam’s I know (short for Samuel), I may think Sam was a man. Despite that, I still see Sam as androgynous.
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I once worked with a boy named Shannon. He said people automatically assumed he was a girl before meeting him. He talked about how one year in elementary school the teacher had made pink and purple name plates for the girls and blue and green for the boys. He got a purple name plate. To me Alex is a unisex name. I don’t automatically assume an Alex is a boy or a girl until I meet them. The same for a Chris or Kelly.
Ashley is feminine to me and Mickey is masculine.
Nikita is a female name in English speaking countries but in Russia it is masculine.
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I grew up with guys called Aubrey, Ashley, Courtney, Terry, and always see these as masculine. Knew both a boy and a girl called Shannon, a boy Kris and a girl Chris. Did know girls called Jo, Randi, but the spellungs pretty much give them away.
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Alex and Sam are used so often by girls that I feel like they're more associated with girls than boys at this point (also, Totally Spies). Chris - written that way - feels firmly masculine. Kris or Cris(se) on the other hand feels feminine. Terry, Mickey and Lee still feel more masculine than feminine to me.I had a male teacher named Ashley so to me that name is unisex. Kelly reminds me of R. Kelly who should be in jail for life, so it shouldn't be used by any gender tbh.
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Sometimes, although it depends on the culture of a specific area. For instance in my region I would assume Pat and Terry were short for Patricia and Teresa, not Patrick and Terrence. If you mentioned "Pat" without any gendered pronouns I'd assume "she". I wouldn't assume one way or the other with Sam or Lee. With Alex and Chris I'd probably assume boy first, but wouldn't be surprised at all if they were girls and I'd probably ask instead of just assuming if I needed to know. With Mickey, I'd assume boy and probably not bother to ask. I think most people avoid that name anyway though, because it sounds like Mickey Mouse. All the names you mentioned for boys, yes I would assume they were girls. I've met several boys named Kelly but it's still a girl name by default in my brain. As an American I'm vaguely aware that there are girls named Ashley in the world but that's not a fact I would remember in the moment, I'd just automatically assume it was a girl and not consider that I might be wrong unless someone corrected me.
I've also met a few boys named Mackenzie, and I like that name on a boy, but I still would assume girl if someone just mentioned the name with no gendered pronouns attached.
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Female Chrises' real names tend to be short for either Christine or Christina. Female Alexes are born Alexandra.
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I've seen more variety with Alex than with Chris-- Alexandria, Alexa, Alexia, Alexis, etc. as well as Alexandra. (I'm sure some of the ones I've met have just been named Alex too, but maybe I assumed it was short for something and never asked.)With Christina, Christine, etc. I think Christy and Chrissy have become a lot more popular nicknames than Chris. When I was younger I met a lot of girls called Chris short for one of those names, but now I feel like I only meet Christy's, Christie's, Chrissy's, etc.
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If they were, it wouldn't last long, either way. FWIW, a couple I know were pregnant and I asked about names. 'Terry!' they chorused. I said 'And if it's a girl?' and they looked at me with sympathetic understanding and once more chorused 'Terry!'.
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I knew a couple over 30 years ago in Michigan who deliberately chose one name for their children regardless of gender as a feminist statement. There first child was Eril and the second was Darian. It ended up the first was female and the second male.
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Eril is surprising: it probably sounds like Errol, which would be confusing. Darian could be geographical (silent upon a peak in Darien) or a version of Dorian (Gray); either way, I'd guess male for that one as well.
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I can say I though Dana White was a woman for a while. Same for men named Aubrey and Audrey.
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You mean UFC president Dana White? Yes, he is a man.
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