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This is my son Cotton
You say: How unusual!
You think: How can they name their child that?

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This is my son Bartholomew
You say: Do you call him Bart?
You think: I hope they call him Bart! What a mouthful!

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This is my son Cornelius (Neely)
You say: I once had a friend named Neely
You think: She was a girl...

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This is my son Florian
You say: How unusual!
You think: How effeminate! Poor kid...

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This is my daughter Magnolia
You say: What a lovely name...
You think: I actually do like it...very Southern...

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This is my daughter Octavia
You say: What a neat name...
You think: Too strange and reminds me of octopus

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This is my daughter Beatrix
You say: I've never met a little girl with that name!
You think: Beatrix Potter was great, but I still think "stuffy old english woman"

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This is my daughter Eulalia
You say: How charming!
You think: What a mouthful, must like Marcia Gay Harden....