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Help[Facts] More on J. Dahmer
in reply to a message by Phyllis
The man who killed Dahmer in prison is claiming self defense...
He heard Jeffrey's stomach growl.
What did Jeffrey Dahmer do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his butt.
What was Jeffrey Dahmer's worst nightmare?
A running nose!
Why did Jeffrey keep the heads in the fridge?
So he could keep an eye on the beer.
What did Jeffery Dahmer say to Lorena Bobbit?
You gonna eat that?
Why did Dahmer's teachers think he should become a comedian?
Because he was such a cut-up in class.
Hear about the movie they made about him?
It's called, "Three Men and a Little Gravy"
What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to Pee Wee Herman?
"Stop playing with your food!"
Know why they found a dish of noses in Jeffrey Dahmers fridge?
He was going to make Dahmer-Nose pizza.
How did Jeffery Dahmer like to spend his spare time.
He had friends over for lunch.
What were Dahmer's last words to the guy that killed him in the fight?
"Hey buddy, I used to eat guys like you for breakfast!"
Why was Dahmer about to move?
He was running out of elbow room.
What did the chief investigator tell the crew moving the Freezer?
Careful, if you drop that heads will roll! .
Did you know that Jeffrey Dahmer was an avid golfer.
Yep, they found a bucket of balls in the closet
Did you hear that he came out with a cook book just before he died?
How to serve your friends at a cocktail party!
Why didn't Dahmer have better lawyers?
It would have cost an arm and a leg.
How was Dahmer described in school?
Class cut-up. Most likely to get ahead.
What were his victims last words?
"Hey, eat me, buddy!"
Have you heard of the Jeffrey Dahmer drink?
An Old Milwaukee with no head.
What was Jeffery Dahmers last meal?
A large pizza with everybody on it.
What kind of Shampoo did Jeffery Dahmer use?
Head and Shoulders
Why did they find testicles in Jeffrey Dahmer's freezer?
Cause sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don't!
What did Dahmer have to do with Iran/Contra?
He came up with the Idea of "Arms for Hostages."
Jeffrey Dahmer's apartment is for rent. It's advertised as:
Three bedroom, partially furnished, roommates included, some assembly required.
What do Jeffery Dahmer and Eleanor Rigby both have in common?
They both go to sleep every night with a "face in a jar by the door"!
Why won't the guys in prison play cards with Jeff?
He always comes up with an extra hand.
What is Jeffrey Dahmer's favorite food?
Beans and Frank.
Why did Jeffery Dahmer prefer eating his victims?
Because a sandwich is a sandwich, but a man-wich is a meal.
What did Dahmer say when the cops came to arrest him?
"Come on guys, have a heart!"
He heard Jeffrey's stomach growl.
What did Jeffrey Dahmer do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his butt.
What was Jeffrey Dahmer's worst nightmare?
A running nose!
Why did Jeffrey keep the heads in the fridge?
So he could keep an eye on the beer.
What did Jeffery Dahmer say to Lorena Bobbit?
You gonna eat that?
Why did Dahmer's teachers think he should become a comedian?
Because he was such a cut-up in class.
Hear about the movie they made about him?
It's called, "Three Men and a Little Gravy"
What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to Pee Wee Herman?
"Stop playing with your food!"
Know why they found a dish of noses in Jeffrey Dahmers fridge?
He was going to make Dahmer-Nose pizza.
How did Jeffery Dahmer like to spend his spare time.
He had friends over for lunch.
What were Dahmer's last words to the guy that killed him in the fight?
"Hey buddy, I used to eat guys like you for breakfast!"
Why was Dahmer about to move?
He was running out of elbow room.
What did the chief investigator tell the crew moving the Freezer?
Careful, if you drop that heads will roll! .
Did you know that Jeffrey Dahmer was an avid golfer.
Yep, they found a bucket of balls in the closet
Did you hear that he came out with a cook book just before he died?
How to serve your friends at a cocktail party!
Why didn't Dahmer have better lawyers?
It would have cost an arm and a leg.
How was Dahmer described in school?
Class cut-up. Most likely to get ahead.
What were his victims last words?
"Hey, eat me, buddy!"
Have you heard of the Jeffrey Dahmer drink?
An Old Milwaukee with no head.
What was Jeffery Dahmers last meal?
A large pizza with everybody on it.
What kind of Shampoo did Jeffery Dahmer use?
Head and Shoulders
Why did they find testicles in Jeffrey Dahmer's freezer?
Cause sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don't!
What did Dahmer have to do with Iran/Contra?
He came up with the Idea of "Arms for Hostages."
Jeffrey Dahmer's apartment is for rent. It's advertised as:
Three bedroom, partially furnished, roommates included, some assembly required.
What do Jeffery Dahmer and Eleanor Rigby both have in common?
They both go to sleep every night with a "face in a jar by the door"!
Why won't the guys in prison play cards with Jeff?
He always comes up with an extra hand.
What is Jeffrey Dahmer's favorite food?
Beans and Frank.
Why did Jeffery Dahmer prefer eating his victims?
Because a sandwich is a sandwich, but a man-wich is a meal.
What did Dahmer say when the cops came to arrest him?
"Come on guys, have a heart!"
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Replies
Great Jokes. They are just what i was looking for.
1
"Mmmm.... JOE-nuts...."
I love tasteless Jeffrey Dahmer jokes. But you left out perhaps the most tasteless one of all -- my favorite because it offends on all levels:
What does Jeffrey Dahmer do when he gets done eating his vegetables?
He throws away the wheel chairs.
:)
-- Nanaea
I love tasteless Jeffrey Dahmer jokes. But you left out perhaps the most tasteless one of all -- my favorite because it offends on all levels:
What does Jeffrey Dahmer do when he gets done eating his vegetables?
He throws away the wheel chairs.
:)
-- Nanaea
1
Hehe, thanks for un-censoring me :))
1